Showing posts with label Monty Pythons. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Monty Pythons. Show all posts

Sunday, October 18, 2015

DESDINOVA'S HALLOWEEN PODCAST 3 (Pitney Bowes worst nightmare)

Another podcast and I still have more than enough music for another podcast before Halloween. This one such great Halloween jams as:
  • "Black Juju" - Alice Cooper
  • "She's My Witch" - Kip Tyler
  • "Vampire Rock" - Fabulous Poodles
  • "I'm In Love With Dracula's Daughter" - Screaming Lord Sutch
  • "Igor's Party" - Tony's Monstrosities
  • "Frankenstein" - New York Dolls
  • "Plan 9, Channel 7" - The Damned
Along with appearances from Torgo, the Monty Pythons, Criswell, Colin Clive, Bela Lugosi, and a hot babe that was married to Frankie Lane. Also I'll continue to make fun of that STL Cardinal fan, who chewed me out at work over a commercial that had a screaming woman in it. Oh yeah, Elmo & Patsy get theirs.

Sunday, August 16, 2015

CRAZY KNIGHTS: THREE OFF-KILTER MEDIEVAL MOVIES

You silly, English, bedwetting types.

There have been films about medieval times since the beginning of film. Knights have managed to stay popular into modern times. You will find more sets of toy knights in a toy store over the once popular toy cowboys. The films, usually, fall into the categories of Arthurian legend, Chaucer based, Sir Walter Scott based, and historically accurate (read: boring).

I've selected three films, two from the 70s and one from 2001 that uses rock songs from the 70s, that veer off from the typical medieval film into their own little kingdoms.

He told them about how he wanted to try a threesome.

1. TORTURE DUNGEON (1970):  All I need to say here is this is a knock-off of the Tower of London, directed by Andy Milligan. Of course, that wouldn't be much fun. Would it? This is the story of Norman, Duke of Norwich, a one-armed, tantrum-throwing, self-proclaimed "tri-sexual" (because he will "try anything"), who tries to take the throne of the kingdom of Terragon by killing everyone of the heirs to the throne ahead of him. Norman (Milligan regular Jeremy Brooks a.k.a Gerald Jacuzzo) looks like a cross between Freddie Mercury and Sonny Bono, while Terragon looks suspiciously like Staten Island.

(L to R) Peter the Ear, Peter the Eye & the nose of Peter the Nose

As with any Milligan film, the dialog is filled with snippy remarks and mentions of gang rape, incest, necrophilia, child abuse, and sadism of all sorts. Add to this a collection of characters such as the kingdom's council made up of Peter the Eye (Milligan regular Neil Flanagan), Peter the Ear and Peter the Nose. The last two characters are played by two uncredited brothers, wearing Beatle wigs, who would fit in more in an episode of The Sopranos than a Medieval drama. The most outrageous character is Magda the marriage councilor. She dresses like a butterfly and sings and dances, while trying to explain how to have sex to the young heroine (Susan Cassidy). The top portion of Cassidy's costume does come together, so her boobs tend to flop out during a chase scene.

She's giving advice on sex and she picked out that outfit.

TORTURE DUNGEON in many ways could be called Milligan's masterpiece, but I prefer to see it as Milligan's twisted fairy tale of Medieval England.

The late Heath Ledger

2. A KNIGHT'S TALE (2001): I realize some will say a movie from 2001 doesn't belong on a retro blog, but the director of this film felt that the 1370s were probably similar to the 1970s, so I think it can be reviewed here. Not only is this loosely based on Geoffrey Chaucer's A Knight's Tale, but Chaucer is a character (often buck naked) in this movie. This comedy-adventure not only spins a engaging yarn of a young man's quest to achieve his dream of becoming a knight, but satirizes the sports culture. The film is filled with turn of the Millennium pop culture references and a great soundtrack made up of 70s classic rock.

He looks like Carson and Letterman would throw him off

The film stars the late Heath Ledger as William, who has dreamed of being a knight since childhood. He comes of age as the squire for a knight. When the knight dies before a tournament, he takes his place using a phony birthright written by Geoffrey Chaucer. He not only befriends Chaucer (Paul Bettany), but Prince Edward and the feisty widow blacksmith, Kate, who makes him armor with a Nike swoosh on it. William falls in love with a noble woman, Jocelyn. He also makes an enemy of a arrogant knight named Count Adhemar, who is sort of a Medieval version of a 80s teen comedy preppy jock, but baring an uncanny resemblance to actor Oliver Reed.

One fun thing to watch for is a flashback, where an old man, who mocks young William's desire to be a knight. It is actor Berwick Kaler, who appeared in several of Andy Milligan's films (not TORTURE DUNGEON though) including, The Rats Are Coming, The Werewolves Are Here, The Body Beneath and as Tobias in The Bloodthirsty Butchers.

A KNIGHT'S TALE is fun and exciting, once you get past the fact that it doesn't take Medieval history very serious.

3. MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL (1974): Only the Monty Python guys could take King Arthur and stand it on it's head. To tell much about this movie would give away this best gags before some people would see it. Everyone should see this before they die. If you don't watch it or rewatch it, we will be forced to say "NEE" to you.        

Monday, September 2, 2013

SIR DAVID FROST DIES

Broadcaster David Frost, famed for Nixon apology, dies | ABS-CBN News

Frost began with a satirical news show That Was The Week That Was, which was the forerunner of the Daily Show (and my old blog). He became famous in the late 60s and early 70s for his celebrity interview shows. His most famous interview subject was former President Nixon, but my favorite interview was this one, from an appearance on the Flip Wilson Show.


Friday, December 2, 2011

WHO SHOULD REPLACE CHRISTIAN BALE AS BATMAN?


Actor Christian Bale has announced he will not play Batman again. I didn't like his Batman movies. I even said on my old blog that that The Dark Knight would suck before it even hit the theaters. Some little dork got upset about it and even had other comic book geeks posting nasty things about me on IMDB. I should note that if you Google "the dark knight sucks" you will find that many people agreed with me. There is even a Facebook sight for people who feel the same as me about the film.

I've decided to give you my idea of what the next Batman movie, after The Dark Knight Rising, should be like and who should be in it. First off, it needs to be a hip, satirical comedy version of the 60's TV series, much like the Brady Bunch movies of the 90s. As for stars, Batman should be played by Patrick Warburton, who played The Tick in the TV show (Top photo). Robin the Boy Wonder should be played by Justin Bieber (Bottom photo). Alfred should be played by John Cleese and Aunt Harriet by Jean Stapleton (Edith from All In the Family and the movie featured in my last post, Cold Turkey). Rounding out the cast would be Robbie Coltrane as Chief O'Hara and as Adam West as Commissioner Gordon.

Of course, an opinion, like this one, is why I'm considered the Super-Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
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